As a child you go about life pretty much selfishly at first. Cry to get fed. Cry for a new diaper. Cry to be held. You become a toddler and you try to keep it easy for everyone by doing the same but NOOOO they want you to wait and learn to "use your words". Then you become school age and you try to again to do what you were told "use your words" but now they want you to talk less, listen more and follow directions, so you can do it yourself. Along comes those pre-adult years; the teen years and now you want to do things yourself, be talked to less and not be controlled by directions. Next thing you know you are out in the world on your own and wow it is all about you again. What pleases you, makes you feel happy and building your life however you want no directions required. Now this is the life! Wham! You wake up one day and you have a spouse and children. When did that happen and where in the world are the directions? Okay, you think I can do this, deep breath, what did my parents say about how to talk things through, how to plan ahead, how to avoid debt and most of what was it they said about going to college? What was I thinking? Oh, yeah I have plenty of time to go to college, to save money and pay off those credit cards for now I will have fun.
So, the years have past and life just seemed to happen no plan, not really just took it one event at a time. I have always been amazed at the people that planned so far ahead that they even planned what month the would like to get pregnant so a child was born in a certain month. Or even making sure they had 3 years between every child. How about those people that even planned far enough ahead that they decided to have the first letter of every child's name start with the same letter. Geeze Louise, I rarely thought about what I would be having for dinner much less crazy things like calculating the exact year each kids should be born. Well, this year as I celebrate the life that God has given me I am thankful He has a plan all worked out. Oh and by the way when I have fluttered from one step in life to the next He would always bring me back to His path you know the one that He planned. Anyway, this year as I started a new thing, planning ahead as God prompted me through prayer, I looked at what celebrations we would see this year. I realized not planning made it possible for us to celebrate Alex turning 16, Beth and Brittany turning 13, I will turn fabulously 40, Stephanie and Alex will graduate high school, Stephanie will turn 18 and Willie and I will celebrate 20 years of marriage. That my friends is just the celebration of those that live within our four walls. I forgot the most exciting, aside from being married 20 years, Willie and I get the privilege of going to Romania to share God's Truths. With all that I can say that in all my years before leaving home none of this was ever planned out or even a fleeting thought in my head and without God blowing me gently at times, sternly shoving at others and most defiantly stopping me dead in my tracks at least once to put me back on the path He planned for my life I would not be as amazingly happy as I am today.
You see, although, I could have planned better and avoided a lot of hard, painful, scary and sad times in my life I would not be who I am today broken and on my knees before my God the Lord of my life saying take me where ever it is you have planned. I am ready and I am yours do with me what you will. I am ready to be a school aged child again and talk less, listen more and follow your direction. Thank you for the life you have planned for me while I was too busy flying by the seat of my pants.
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